Dude, I Hate Your Girlfriend!

Posted on August 31, 2008 / Thoughts

After I broke up with my ex-girlfriend (actually she broke up with me), a few of my friends came up to me and told me they never liked her. I have great friends, right? But seriously, she was a bitch. Even my mom didn't like her! And my mom likes everyone. I guess I'm glad we didn't get married otherwise nobody would hang out with me.

But i started to think whether or not my opinion of her would have changed during the course of our relationship if somebody told me they didn't like her. Although one friend said he didn't quite trust her, which may be the same as "she sucks!" So I started to question whether we, as friends, are responsible for telling our friends that we don't like their significant others? I'm sure everyone has a friend that dated that bitch, i.e., that girl that nobody liked! that treacherous, back-stabbing, she-devil, man-eating, whorification of a woman! Yeah, her! Could of been your girlfriend (like mine) or maybe it's your friends significant other. Or maybe it's you?!? Yeah, you. Yeah the person reading this sentence now. I don't know, though. So don't get mad at me.

Anyways, it usually takes quite a bit of time before a friend comes out and says anything (if it even happens). During the months after my relationship ended I kinda wished that somebody had stated previously that they didnt like my girlfriend. I personally wouldn't have gotten mad but most people probably would. It kinda sucks when somebody comes up to you and says "dude, i hate your girlfriend, she's a bitch!" And you're sitting there thinking, "I've spent a year of my life with this girl. She's great. She makes me happy. She fondles my balls when i ask." Then 2 months later you're getting drunk with your friends (that you've ignored for 2 months because he dissed your girl). And the whole while your thinking "man, this dude was right! She is a bitch!"

It's probably because you're a terrible boyfriend too! Seriously, you suck! Naw, lets not lie about the situation. She was a bitch. Anyways, my real questions is whether it's okay to tell your friend you (and perhaps the rest of his friends) hate their significant other. Lets put it this way, if we do feel this animosity towards a friend's significant other, are we responsible to tell them? Or are some things better unsaid?

Personally I think we're getting to a point in our lives where our relationships begin to take a hold of our lives and kind of encompass the everyday routine of our lives. We eventually push our friends away to make room for school, work or significant others. This is okay, though. It's the natural course of growing up. But most people have a tendency to get attached to certain people while they are in certain situations. They begin to feel comfortable and that comfortability hinders any real chance of falling in love. Perhaps these situations are the ones that require a friend to interject with a "dude, you're girlfriend is a bitch. I hate her!" 

From my experiences with these situations, the friends are usually right. It may not be that she is inherently a bitch or a bad person, but that she just isn't right for that person. Maybe we should take more advice from friends since they have that outside perspective of us. But maybe our friends should be more open with us?